Master of None

My parents can attest that I’ve had the drive to write since I was very small. But that wasn’t the only drive I had, even back then. My first book was about bunnies and was written and drawn on construction paper then stapled together and hidden away in my mom’s underwear drawer for 20+ years.

In first grade, I was sent home for “cheating” on my spelling test because the paper I was drawing on ended up being the backside of the spelling list. In fourth grade, I actually drew pictures and sold them for $.50 to classmates. All my stuff was pretty terrible back then, but I tried.

In high school, I was drawing images of the characters from my books. They were still pretty bad, but better than what 9 year old me had drawn. It wasn’t as good as a couple of my really artistic friends, but it was good enough.

In college, I was drawing fan-art that was mediocre but had short stories with it. Neither the art nor the stories were as good as the people who focused on one or another, but they were alright. I could get better and be acceptable.

That’s the problem I face all the time. I’m just okay at several things. I can draw alright and I can write pretty well, plus I can do web development and bake, but I feel like I’ll never manage to get past being just okay (maybe stretching to Good) at any of those things. I’ll never be amazing at any of them.

So I need to figure out how to be okay with just being okay at things. I’m not bad at them, I can get by. Maybe being just okay but being really persistent is enough. It’s all I have, so I’ll have to make it work somehow.

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